What Would Suze Orman Say?
People first, then money, then things. Bring her a purchase you're eyeing and your financial foundation — leave with an APPROVED or DENIED and the list of what to fix first.
Your emergency fund vs her bar
Suze wants 8–12 months of expenses — more than almost anyone else recommends.
What he'd have you do next
In order. Straight from the philosophy.
The rules this tool applies
Her non-negotiables
An 8–12 month emergency fund (yes, really — most advisors say 3–6; she watched 2008 happen). Zero high-interest debt. Life insurance if anyone depends on your income — term, not whole life. A will, living revocable trust and powers of attorney no matter your age. Retirement funded before treats.
How the Approved/Denied works
She approves a purchase only when the foundation is solid AND you can pay cash without knocking the emergency fund below 8 months. A financed want with credit card debt in the background gets the famous “DENIED — you cannot afford it!”
The fine print
This is an educational parody applying Suze Orman's well-documented public philosophy to your numbers. All verdict lines are paraphrases in his style — not real quotes. Not affiliated with or endorsed by Suze Orman. For actual advice, talk to a licensed professional.